Mother's Day

Gotta love the Mother's Day pictures...maybe one day, we will manage to get just one where everyone is looking the same direction...either way, I love my babies!!!

A year ago...

So I've been trying to write this post for about 2 weeks now, and every time I start, I give up or erase it all...I don't exactly know why I can't figure out what to say, or how to say it...

About a year ago, we found out about Calder's cleft at our 20 week ultrasound. It is crazy to remember the shock and devastation we felt, the many tears we cried, the fear, the unknown...

Now, here we are, so much of that behind us already...on a journey that we never expected would be so difficult and so wonderful all at once. We are blessed beyond belief with an amazing support system=family and friends, fabulous doctors, and the very best, most adorable little man on the planet...how could we possibly wish it to be any different?

There are so many analogies I could use, mantras that I continually fall back on when things seem hard...but this has truly been a life-changing experience. I've had a HUGE shift in perspective about a lot of things...and found strength I didn't know I had. I know that God's plans sometimes reveal themselves in ways we never expect, and I know that Calder is truly a special gift.

I hate that my precious child has to suffer through surgeries and painful recovery. I hate that later in his life he may encounter people who are cruel and ignorant. These are the things I would change.

I love that my precious child gave me 2 first smiles, one big wide one, and the new one that I can't get enough of. I love that he has made me a stronger, better, more accepting person. I love that he proves to me each and every day that he is NO DIFFERENT than any other baby. These are the things I wouldn't trade for the world.

Having a crystal ball a year ago would have been nice, but the journey to get here has been just as important. Our family has grown in many ways, and our little man has taught us more than we will ever know. I can only hope and pray that we are able to make his journey as wonderful as he has already made ours. We love you Calder!

My Beautiful Girl

Caydree...

I rarely get smiles out of my first munchkin these days...this one was so close!! She is a ragamuffin, a parrot, and a sassy-pants...3 1/2 going on 13, empathetic beyond her years, and a great big sister...a free-spirit who will make you a deal and try to reason her way into or out of anything.

I miss her smiles for photos, but sure do enjoy them when they appear--they are so genuine and spontaneous. She lights up to entertain her baby brother...and her favorite line is, "he's smilin' at me..." which I in turn respond to, "of course he is, he loves you!" SO true...he can't get enough of her, and would smile at her all day.

She truly is my sweet, beautiful girl, and I am so thankful and proud to be her mommy. Even when she crosses her arms at me and gives me the stink eye, I love her more than life...

She's already planning her 4th birthday, for the thousandth time... she is growing up, and I want to remember every minute. So for now, I will keep taking pictures, smiling or not...of my beautiful girl.

Updates

I realized yesterday while we were at the plastic surgeon's office for a follow up, that I couldn't remember if I'd put up any info/stats about our 6 month check. About a month ago now, little man weighed in at 15.3 lbs, and is hanging steady at the 10th percentile. All the doctors seem happy with his initial gains and now his consistency. I am just a little concerned now that he is more active...burning more calories...and sleeping through the night...one less bottle, so I guess we will see in the next month how he does.

Also at that appointment, they gave us a referral for the pediatric opthalmologist, to check his poor little tear ducts. He has always had goopy eyes, sometimes worse than others...so we will be going in May 11th for that appointment down in San Diego. Worst case scenario is that they are clogged ducts and they don't think they will clear up or open on their own...then they have to do another surgery. We are hoping that he'll outgrow it!!!

Yesterday we went to the plastic surgery follow up. He gave us info to start massaging the lip scar with a silicone gel, so mommy needs to get online and order it. Funny, he pointed out all the imperfections in the lip repair and nose job...I guess as a PS, that's his job...but we just love the results, and don't think Calder can get much cuter! :) He also gave us some cautiously optimistic news about his palate, and it looks like they will most likely be able to do the palate repair in July! That seems really soon to me now, but it was what I was hoping for, so I wouldn't have to take any time off once school started. Say a prayer for us, and keep your fingers crossed! He was happy with the way it had already come together so much from the lip repair, and wants to see 6 more weeks of growth before giving us a date.

The only other big thing we have coming up is the hearing test on May 13. I guess this is the one I am most nervous about, as it is directly linked to speech acquisition and the possibility there could be some hearing loss due to the fluid he had before his tubes were put in. We know he can hear, so we are hoping for the best, but we will see! That's about it in the medical department, for now. Thanks for all of your continued thoughts and prayers for our little man!

Making a break for it...

We desperately need to "re-babyproof our house! Calder is scooting all over the place, and you just forget how many things a crawling baby can actually get into. My favorite is probably the hair balls from our fluffy cat Wally. We could sweep/vacuum 2-3 times a day and there would still be hair balls...yuck! The funny thing is that Wally's favorite place to lay is always right on the blanket I've laid out for little man...typical cat. Oh well...Calder loves him, and he is pretty tolerant to the petting of a 7 month old. This is Wally, according to Caydree he was cold...

I've also been wanting to put a video clip up, so I'm going to attempt it. Sorry you Facebookers, this is the same one of him scooting...I've got to get some more going now that he is almost

"crawling"! He's getting up on all fours, and taking some actual steps! Just this evening, at our friend's house, he pulled himself up to standing on this storybook chair, then climbed up onto the chair, sitting on his knees, and tired to climb onto the hearth of the fireplace! All I can say is that we are in BIG trouble, he's already a maniac!

Easter...

How did I miss putting these up? I thought I'd put some pictures up here, but apparently that was Facebook...? So, here are a few of our Easter pictures! I was a very brave soul this year, and decided to take the kiddos (all by myself on an airplane) to Tucson to meet up with Grandma and Grandpa, Great-Grandpa, and the aunts, uncles and cousins. It didn't seem so bad initially, but I will say that next time I travel with the kids, I will not do it alone!

We had a lot of fun with family in Tucson. We went to the Botanical Gardens to their butterfly exhibit, where these pictures were taken...

Caydree and Grandma

Calder with Grandpa and Great-Grandpa

We spent Easter Sunday, after church, at cousin Emily's house for a delicious lunch and fun family time!

Calder with mommy

Caydree with her favorite eggs

This last one is at our house before we left...we decided to dye some eggs and Caydree of course picked the pink and orange ones as her favorites. She rarely looks at the camera for pictures these days, so the fact that I got this good of a picture is pretty exciting!

Needless to say, celebrating Easter with family was really nice!

6 months already?

Actually almost 7, where has the time gone? I don't ever remember it going this fast with Caydree, but maybe it did, and life it just busier so I'm probably not paying as much attention. :(

Calder is sitting, and mastered the "marine" crawl just in the past couple of days! He of course, heads straight for anything you don't want him to have, and wants everything that you are holding, no matter what it is. The first place he goes is under the coffee table, and he has figured out how to climb over the pillow barricades we put around him, so we may be in the market for a baby pen! :)

Had our 6 mo. appointment...weighed in at 15.3 pounds, so he is hanging out in the 10th percentile. Doctor is happy with that, and they are not worried about any other growth, he's at about the 50th for height and head size. The same day, Mamma took him down to San Diego for a genetics follow up. That went great as well, I sent her with a long list of things to tell them and to ask...so I'm sure they think I'm the one with the problems! LOL...

I was/am most concerned about speech delays, but he is only 6 mo, and I need to relax about it. He has a hearing test in May, and I know they will be able to tell us more then, so I'll just wait!

Other than that, he's sleeping all night 8-10 hours in his own crib, and only chose to wake up super early this morning...so we've been up for over an hour, and mommy doesn't really know how she is going to get ready for work, but we'll figure it out. Gotta go wake sister up now too, so the next 1/2 hour will be fun before I have to leave. ;)